by TK
(Lagos, Nigeria )
My husband and I will be married 10 yrs by October 2016. He is supposedly Christian, but I have to be honest that he is secular. We have 3 children together, one of which is an 11 months baby.
I had suspected for a while that he is cheating on me. I felt him withdraw love for me for about 2 years at least, prob ably about 3 years even. I tried in the past to talk to him about how I was feeling, but he appeared distant and not fully committed to the discussions. I was always heart broken and afraid after each discussion.
On three separate occasions over the last three years, I asked him if he was/is cheating on me. Each time, he actually convinced me that he wasn't and I truly believed him, though the signs were there. He will go out to take a call, not hand me his phone for Internet use when mine was down, keep his phone password from me, leave his work bag in the car, dissuade me from attending office functions etc.
Recently, on his phone, I saw notifications of WhatsApp messages from another woman which were inappropriate. I checked further and saw deleted email messages where he had been inappropriate as well.
I confronted him that night as I could not sleep. I demanded his phone which he gave to me (first time in two yrs). The moment I was about going through the phone, he immediately tried to snatched it from me.
Since that day, I have discovered he is still in an affair with the woman and possibly other women. He has refused to admit this. The only admission is the inappropriate messages I saw. I also think he has a child outside of our marriage.
To date he is still having the affair. He does not know I know. He is lying everyday but tries to be nice to me. But he doesn't want to pray with me or take me out either alone or with the kids. He struggles to look me in the eye.
He is very strong and has an appealing charisma when he wants to turn it on. He is very manipulative and I have witnessed him being real brutal to people, particularly family members on both my side and his.
He used to be so sweet, loving me and others crazily. Now, I just don't know him anymore. We used to pray together and when we have a misunderstanding, he used to do everything so we are reconciled. Now, he tries to sabotage our discussions by accusing me of some past mistakes we have discussed and resolved long ago.
I am praying and trying to be sweet to him. But it is hard. I feel the Lord leading me not to talk to him anymore about the lies, nor to confront him in my findings yet or maybe at all. But it is so hard.
I just started praying with your website.I have tried to buy the book but the close checkout tab is not selecting. So for now, I am just using the prayers on the website, plus ones I feel the Lord leading me. Please pray with me. I will try to buy the book again.